About a Month Left!

Almost There

So if you are caught up with my blog at all and read my first post, you saw that I mentioned my parents have been making me get a job working for a tree service company during the summer. Now that is is November, I have about a month left until I can hang up my tree trimmers until next year (or hopefully for good). The whole tree service industry obviously slows down to pretty much nothing during the winter and I have to go to school so my parents were “nice” enough to not make me stick it out throughout the year. This last month is the absolute worst though. It’s starting to get cold so now every single job that I have to do sucks. At least in the summer I can get a tan and I am not absolutely miserable the entire time. Now I am freezing and my hands are getting numb every day. You can’t really wear any real thick gloves while you work either because the tools we have to use are just too hard to handle carefully with some bulky things on your hands.

Don’t Think I Can Make it

Now that I am grounded (see here), I hate having to work even more. You would think it would be the opposite; but knowing that after I spend hours outside tree pruning, I know that all I have to look forward to is going home to even more absolute boredom. I think I might go crazy before this month is over.


Once this month is over, I don’t have to step inside another job and I will be completely free from my parents wrath FOR GOOD. Well, at least 6 or 7 months but words cannot describe how excited I am for this glorious time. I can see it now. I am going to gain 15 pounds from drinking coke and eating doritos for 5 days straight on my X Box to make up for all this lost time. Oh my God I want to play Halo 5 right now. So bad.

Any of you out there have any stories that landed you a month of being grounded? This is the longest my parents have ever gone and I really don’t think it was even that big of a deal. I know that we could have gotten hurt or whatever if something went terribly wrong, but what is there to do that there isn’t some slight chance that you will get hurt? I can’t think of anything besides sitting in front of my TV or computer that’s worth doing.

Have our parents and grown ups never been teenagers themselves? Was there some kind of magical machine back in the day that would instantly age people 15 years? I have friends that could write books on some of the horrible and dangerous things they do every single day and never get in any kind of trouble that I get in. I know that my parents care about me and love me and all of that nonsense, but they really need to lighten up sometimes. This is going to drive me insane…

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Parents, They’re the WORST!!

Grounded… Again

Well today was just another addition to my ever growing list of why being a teenager sucks. My parents are pissed… Really pissed.

No, my parents aren’t actually Nazis, but sometimes I feel like they might have a little of the DNA hidden somewhere deep down inside of them.

What Went Down

Alright so we all know teenagers tend to do stupid things and I am no exception.

I understand that.

But yesterday my parents went WAY too far. The day started off like any normal day. I woke up at the ungodly hour of 6:00 am to get ready for my soon to be shitty day of school. Everything at school went alright and wasn’t out of the ordinary at all. Unfortunately no exciting stories to tell there.

So after school, me and my friends like to go to the mall or go to a restaurant or do whatever other stupid things teenagers do to keep ourselves occupied. So we all met at my house after school and we hung out here playing video games for a while and planned on meeting some girls up to see a movie later.

So far so good.

The movie started at 10 so we left my house at around 9 and this is where I messed up.

My friend Ethan was driving us all and he was parked in my street (there was 4 of us). So they all got in his car and for whatever reason, I thought it would be a good idea to lay on top of the hood of his car and just stay there to see if he would actually drive off.

Well… He did.

So he started the car and slowly began going down my street with me still on the hood. I don’t know why I did it or why he decided to actually go but we went with it. He never got over 5 or 10 mph and he stopped when we made it to the end of my street where I proceeded to get off and get in the car. We all had our laughs and we didn’t think twice about it.

The Aftermath

After the movie, Ethan drove us all home because unfortunately none of us were getting laid so we just went back to my house. When I walked in the house my mom and dad were both sitting at the kitchen table and my mom was CRYING.

Is there anything worse than making your own mother cry?

So at first, I honestly had no idea what was going on and I thought someone died in the family or something. Turns out my stupid neighbor saw the whole car surfing thing and immediately called my parents to tell them that some stupid kid at his church died riding on top of someones car and he just wanted to let my parents know about what was going on.

Needless to say my friends got the hell out of there ASAP and left me alone to deal with the mess. I really don’t know what the big deal is. Alright fine, I guess I could have gotten hurt if I had fallen off or something but we weren’t drunk and we’re not complete morons.

Well, long story short I am grounded…. FOR A MONTH!!!!!

No phone.

No Xbox.

No friends.

They wanted to take my laptop away but I convinced them that I need it for school and there is no way I could live without it so this is going to be my only contact with the outside world for a while… Aren’t some fairy god parents (man, I miss that show) supposed to show up out of no where and save me from this?

Time cannot go by fast enough.

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Being a Teenager Sucks

Preach on brothers… Preach on.

Welcome to my first official post! If you couldn’t guess by now, I am one of those horrible creatures called a teenager and I am SICK OF IT!!!

Seriously, time could not go by fast enough and I am so ready to grow up. Girls suck. My acne sucks. School sucks. My parents suck. My job sucks. EVERYTHING SUCKS!!!!

A lot of people tell me that I need to slow down and embrace these times of my life and that it only happens once, but they don’t know what they are talking about. Let’s go down the list, shall we?


I really could just leave this part blank because there are too many things to list that I hate about school. My teachers still all talk to us like we are pre schoolers and show us no respect. I mean come on. We are all going through puberty and our hormones are going crazy and you expect us all to sit in a class and actually pay close attention to some pissed off old guy rambling on about GOD KNOWS WHAT. Even if you cut the time that we have to sit in school every day in half, it would be too much. We have the internet now old people, WE DON’T NEED TO KNOW HALF OF THE NONSENSE YOU ARE SPEWING OUT AT US. Whether you old folk like it or not, times have changed and we all have access to google now. Your once infinite wisdom is not so infinite anymore. Sorry not sorry.

Summer Jobs

So if the 8 hours a day at school aren’t enough, my parents have made me get a summer job the last 2 years at some stupid tree service company that my dad is friends with the owner of. I hate this job almost more than I hate school. Since I’m young I am not allowed to use any of the real heavy duty equipment and I am pretty much a slave to these people just cleaning up after them and filling up the hours of the day to keep my parents happy. I really am not learning any life skills that I am going to carry on forever from this job. Sorry Mom and Dad, I am just not a tree or nature person.


Don’t get me wrong, I love all you ladies out there. I couldn’t go on if it weren’t for you. But your jealousy and insecurity is going to be all of your downfalls. I have had a few girlfriends throughout my years and every single one of them turns into some overbearing succubus that sucks the life right out of me. You are not even allowed to LOOK at another girl if you have a girlfriend in high school, let alone talk to one. I am done with women at the ripe age of 16. I have had enough of them. With my last girlfriend, if I even “liked” a girls picture on Facebook, I would feel the absolute wrath of her within minutes. I don’t know how women are so intuitive. I swear they have psychic powers…

Well, stay tuned to my blog to hear what else sucks about being a teenager! There is lots to cover here!

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